Rainbow 3

My faith has been stretched, pulled, and pressed beyond what I thought possible.

“We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair;  persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.”

2 Corinthians 4:8-9

This year truly demanded my attention, face down at the alter. It brought so many firsts for Matt and I. We prayed desperately for God to use us and stretch us. We wanted His spirit to fall out upon us. To fill us. To lead us. God opened doors for us to fill an interim role as youth pastors. He provided a mission opportunity that was confirmed in so many ways that God’s hand was all over it. But in all honesty, it all scared me.

I struggle with fear. Before I said “I do” I never considered myself a fear filled person. But since that day Satan has exploited my weakness. He dangles a big juicy apple in front of me that sometimes I bite. I fall prey to my weakness.

I am afraid of all sorts of things. Matt being gone for 6 months, or fires, or car wrecks. Or my children drowning, or cancer, or plane rides. Or even something maybe less tragic but just as scary…

What if my daughter never talks again? That terrifies me. Fear  can paralyze me and suffocate me. And it is not of HIM!

"The Lord himself goes before me and will be with me; he will never leave me nor forsake me. I will not be afraid; I will not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8

Fear is simply the absence of faith. Where fear is present faith is lacking. In a sense, it mocks God. It says to Him, “You are not enough. I can’t trust you. You can’t solve this. You won’t protect me.”

This is a lie from the depths of hell. Breathed out by Satan himself. And God called me out on it.

“By faith Abraham, when he was called, obeyed by going out to a place which he was to receive for an inheritance; and he went out, not knowing where he was going. By faith he lived as an alien in the land of promise, as in a foreign land, dwelling in tents with Isaac and Jacob, fellow heirs of the same promise; for he was looking for the city which has foundations, whose architect and builder is God. By faith even Sarah herself received ability to conceive, even beyond the proper time of life, since she considered Him faithful who had promised.”

Hebrews 11:8-12

He asked Abraham to sacrifice His own son! A son that he begged and pleaded for. And Abraham obeyed. He obeyed! Are you all getting this? He took his boy, his flesh and blood, and was going to offer him back to God. He had some serious FAITH in the Almighty.

But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. James 1:6

It has been amazing to look back over the past few months and see the awesomeness of our God. He allowed us to take part in an incredible youth trip where the eyes of our students were truly opened to power of the risen Lord. Our church collectively raised over 31,000 dollars to send our team to South Africa. Seriously amazing. God is so faithful.

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1

This week Matt left for Africa. I worried as my husband flew halfway around the world (for a trip that I prayed and prayed for, a trip that I know God affirmed over and over again.) I meticulously updated his flight tracker.

Me of little faith.

"Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." Matthew 17:20

This week it has all come full circle. My faithful Jesus.  He pours out His love on me.

Rainbows are plentiful in the south. Thunderstorms occur nearly daily in the afternoon and then the sun comes back out. God knew long ago where we needed to be in this season of our life, a place that while we trudged through a season of silence, a quiet reminder of God’s promises would perpetually fill our skies.

Last week our sweet daughter found her words.

It was beautiful and breath taking. A perfect gift. A God filled promise. Our rainbow.

She is such a delight. It is an intense joy to hear her speak again and I know it was by no coincidence that her words came flowing out while our church has team on the ground in Africa.

God fulfills His promises to us. He never forsakes us. He pours out His spirit upon us.  But He asks us to trust Him. To have Faith in Him. To relentlessly pursue Him, to run after Him, BECAUSE, He is Faithful.

Naomi and I can’t stop giggling at her. Her words are intoxicating. I feel such an overwhelming gratefulness for her. It is almost as though I have not seen her for 6 months and now she just wants to talk and talk. She can hardly stop. She wants to read, and sing and discipline Lola (our dog.) So much life and peace have been brought to us girls this week through simple words.

Yesterday my girls wanted me to play the Phil Wickham song “At your Name” over and over again. They both were in the back seat singing the chorus over and over and over again.

“Lord of all the earth

We shout Your name, shout Your name

Filling up the skies

With endless praise, endless praise

Yahweh, Yahweh

We love to shout Your name, oh Lord”

Oh my sweet girls. Sing to your King. Shout His name one high. Praise Him when you wake and when you sleep. Keep on singing sisters.

God is always there. In the whispers and burning bushes, in the silence and storms, in the sunrises and sunsets. His faithfulness stretches to the skies. It covers us, encompasses, fills us, farther than we can imagine. I am humbled and overwhelmed at His goodness.

The rainbow. Such a sweet symbol of the truth.  Full of color and light and hope. My Jesus. Took on death. To give me life. And hope. And truth. He died. So my sweet girl could live. So my sweet girl could speak.

May I fill the rainbow filled skies with endless praise.

"For great is your love, reaching to the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies." Psalm 57:10