As the girls and I entered Wal-mart today, Gabby started her usual hissy fit regarding getting in the shopping cart. Naomi has to sit up in the seat part, and Gabby normally insists (well, still screams about it, but for a lot less time, than if I attempt to put her in the seat part) on being in the back of the cart. As I went to put her in the cart she (right on cue) lost it, including but not limited to, flailing around, trying to get one leg out, falling down, standing up, anything you can imagine. She always looses it when we go to any store, but it usually dies down after repeated threats of me telling her that they are going to lock her in the refrigerator. Naomi always looks so frightened for her, and tells her to hush. She sometimes complies. Today however, her "little" fit, was showing her ugly side. My first thought (since spanking is socially unacceptable), was to completely imitate her. I mean seriously, fall down screaming, rolling around on the floor, hitting myself in the face, climbing in and out of the cart...and so forth:) My second thought was to pull her out of the cart and put her right into time-out in the middle of Wal-mart. (Although-her timeouts usually last about 20 minutes, because it takes her 15-18 minutes to actually sit down and stop screaming, for her actual 'time-out' to start.) My third thought, was to just leave her in the middle of wal-mart and see if anyone noticed:)
Of course, I did not do any of these, mainly because we are already flagged down at the local ER as frequent flyers, and I didn't want to give anyone else a reason to call social services on us. (Although I am pretty sure they would bring her back after 24 hours!) I just ignored her for the rest of our Wal-mart visit. I got some pretty interesting looks:) (Last week at the grocery this little old lady came up to me and told me I was doing a good job...as Gabby was SCREAMING...she said you just can not give in and reward bad behavior like so many do!-I guess it was a compliment)
So anyways...we finally finished and got back in the car to head home. I had 30 minutes to get them home before nap time. But of course, Gabby didn't make it. She fell asleep less than a mile from our house. Naomi and I scream and sing and do all sorts of things to keep Gabs up in the car but today she just wore herself out! EVERY TIME she falls asleep in the car she won't go back to sleep. And today like every other day, this proved to be true. I laid the girls down and went and tried to do my 2 miles on the treadmill. About 1.3 miles into it I decided to go check on her. I heard her talking to herself as I got closer to her room. I walk in to find her completely undressed, diaper and all, and talking about her poop that was laying on the floor. YES, you read that right! I cleaned her up and went to put another diaper back on her to try and get her back to sleep and she peed all over me. SERIOUSLY. It was only 2:30 at this point (Matt was going to be working all night) and I was exhausted.
I don't really know why I felt typing all of that up was necessary? Maybe it is somewhat therapeutic to tell people the craziness that I deal with on a daily basis. I know that I am not alone and Gabby is just a very strong-willed 2 year old. Naomi was sooooo compliant at this age that we honestly have no idea what to do with the "terrible 2's." It is all new to us.
Being a mommy to my little firecracker completely confronts what I thought were my greatest strengths. My normal, patient, laid-back, compassionate, even-tempered attitude is tested on a daily basis when dealing with my precious daughter. I have come face to face with some serious insecurities about being a mommy, that I never dealt with, with our first-born. Children reflect their parents, in good ways and bad. I know that 2 years olds' are probably not the best age to judge parenting skills by behavior, but it still makes me wonder. Especially in our case (Matt and I), I am the model for behavior 85% of the time. I desire with all my being to teach my children what it means to be obedient. I want to discipline, teach, serve, and love my babies as Christ would call me to.
Usually by the end of the day I get increasingly irritated with things that really are not that big of a deal. It is just after a whole day of tantrums, crying, time-outs, and so on...I am exhausted.
I have to continually remind myself that I can not judge 2 year old behavior based on an entire day (or they would all be failures) but more so, by if she can make it through an hour, or minute, or even a moment of being obedient. I always ask Matt what we are going to do with her, and he always responds, "Love her." So simple, yet the most demanding command of all.
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On a completely different note our other daughter is becoming quite the theologian.
A few weeks ago I got upset with Gabs for urinating on the floor and I might have raised my voice:) Naomi very calmly told me,
" I never get upset with my puppy and kitty cat."
It actually made me feel horrible!
Today we were talking about Jesus living in our hearts and she said,
"If your scared Jesus will scare the scary bears away. But then he will probably give them a snack since they were hungry."
What? Isn't it just like Jesus to something like that? To protect us from our enemies/bears/scary people but then to go off and feed them.
I am always a perfect little angel and completely compliant with whatever it is you ask of me.
And I most certainly, never give you this look....
(Well, at least not very often!)
